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Songs from the Top Shelf of My Heart

by Chintzy Stetson

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1.
Falling In 04:01
Maybe with a little bit of courage I can make it through the night Something I drank in the bar last time gave me awful nightmares I want an answer when I call him, I adore him, but we fight I said something on the walk home last night, that was awfully crazy When we're falling in, we fall back out When my heart's full of blood, you drain me And falling's not a sin I'd live without All the cancer but you'd have to kill me He doesn't know that I saw him in the alley with his Valli baby blue I thought it was for him and his nerves, he gets awfully anxious He's always going getting in trouble, drinking doubles with his guy friends Suddenly the room's looking funny, head is blurry, overcast Static in my mouth when I speak, feeling weak, did I really say that? Did I really say that? And when we're falling in, we fall back out When my heart's full of blood, you drain me And falling's not a sin I'd live without All the cancer but you'd have to kill me Is this the end for us A lame excuse, a lip gets bust That stuff is not enough To take us where we wanted to be So I trace yellow lines Waiting for a different sign Something to pick me up And take me back to bed forever And when we're falling in And my heart's full of blood And falling's not a sin All the cancer but you'd have to kill me And when we're falling in And my heart's full of blood And falling's not a sin All the cancer but you'd have to kill me
2.
Fair Share 03:28
Your dad's eyes went brothel red Even though you fought him back, you follow what he said Silly shape shifters with their royal smiles Hide behind their curtains on a country mile Yes I saw I don't care You got more, you got more than your fair share Yes I saw It's not fair You got more, you got more than your fair share So you eat up all the headlines and then wash it down with shame Fuck laying any flowers when you're pissing on the grave Longitudes and latitudes make do with what you will You hate everyone who doesn't live inside the ship you built So I'm pushing all the buttons, find the one that makes you tick I'm pissing in the vinegar, I pour it on the itch But it isn't your fault from what your dad told to you He's scrambling all your signals while loosening your screws Yes I saw I don't care You got more, you got more than your fair share Yes I saw I don't care You got more, you got more than your fair share As I dig through the comments I lose my state of mind As I wonder through the forest I thank to God I'm blind To God I'm blind I'm blinded by your lies Yes I saw I don't care You got more, you got more than your fair share Yes I saw I don't care You got more, you got more than your fair share Yes I saw (Yes I saw) It's not fair (It's not fair) That you got more than your fair share
3.
Drinking in the morning Rolling back the awning Fight off my hangover With the cold side of the cover Make my way to John's house He says scared to let dogs out Close the gate behind you Oh the silly things that we do But do you even die, bro? Cuz I don't really think so Yeah do you even die, bro? Cuz I don't really think so She said she'll see me later She's flirting with the waiter Her dogs are in the parlour She's a drinker like her father He can beat you all at snooker Last lady was a looker With his eyes on the prize He wants the tops of her thighs But do you even die, bro? Cuz I don't really think so Yeah do we even die, bro? Cuz I don't really think so But do we even die, bro? Cuz I don't really think so So make me a memento And I'll be on my way But do you even die, bro? Cuz I don't really think so But I'll keep saving up the rainbows For a rainy day But do you even die, bro? Cuz I don't really think so Yeah do we even die, bro? Cuz I don't really think so I push the food around my plate And while I'm losing all this weight My daily tasks are just distractions From what is bound to happen I sit here waiting for my toaster Life's less of a rollercoaster I'm chained here to the sofa And it's where I'm gonna stay
4.
Red Ferrari 03:02
I've been watering my dead plants I've been whistling in the wind You're my red Ferrari The blood in my syringe If I could fold a map to meet you Then I'd be with you in Berlin But with all this misdirection I sit and watch the compass spin Like the birds in the tree Touch the branch with their beaks If it dips you should split Could it be it's time to leave Like the birds in the tree Touch the branch with their beaks If it dips you should split Could it be it's time to leave I watch the cracking in my armour And wipe my worried head Cuz their's an army here to meet me And it's not long before I'm dead On a long haul-flight to nowhere I dream we never touch the ground But when it's finally time to see you The voice in my head's not so loud I ask you will my words endure it The test of time or instead Will they crumble like a creature Crippled by suburban dread And in the morning will my coffee Just be poison from my kids A broken dream, a gap-toothed queen A red Ferrari in the ditch Just like the birds in the tree Touch the branch with their beaks If it dips you should split Could it be it's time to leave Like the birds in the tree Touch the branch with their beaks If it dips you should split Could it be it's time to leave Just like the birds in the trees Touch the branch with their beaks If it dips you should split Maybe now it's time to leave Just like the birds in the trees Touch the branch with their beaks If it dips you should split Maybe now it's time to leave Just like the birds in the trees Touch the branch with their beaks If it dips you should split Maybe now it's time to leave There's no birds in the trees No umbrellas on the beach Sky is torn, rain is sworn Maybe now it's time to leave

credits

released September 15, 2021

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Chintzy Stetson Newcastle Upon Tyne, UK

There was a woman who wore a juicy couture tracksuit, with the rhinestones on the back. She paid for the suite every Friday night. She sold drugs in bin liners and sat on the floor by the bar. She disappeared 2 years ago. I call the hotel every now and then but they say they’ve never seen her before.

I called her Chintzy. She called me Stetson.

Chintzy 💋
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